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Laughter is a universal language that brings joy, lightens our mood, and brings people together. And what better way to bring some laughter into your day than with famous funny quotes? From witty one-liners to clever observations, funny quotes have the power to tickle your funny bone and put a smile on your face.

In this blog post, we've gathered a collection of famous funny quotes that are sure to brighten your day and lift your spirits. Whether you're in need of a pick-me-up, a good laugh, or some humorous inspiration, these quotes are here to bring some laughter and levity into your day. So, get ready to chuckle, giggle, and maybe even snort a little as we dive into the world of famous funny quotes.

Let's get started!

31 Famous funny quotes to brighten your modd

  1. "The best way to predict the future is to create it." - Peter Drucker
  2. "I'm not a businessman, I'm a business, man." - Jay-Z
  3. "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself...and spiders." - Unknown
  4. "The trouble with having an open mind is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it." - Terry Pratchett
  5. "I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious." - Michael Scott
  6. "The only thing that stands between me and a really good time is reality." - Unknown
  7. "I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised." - Unknown
  8. "Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth." - Mallory Hopkins
  9. "I'm not lazy, I'm on energy-saving mode." - Unknown
  10. "The early bird can have the worm, because worms are gross and mornings are stupid." - Unknown
  11. "The trouble with jogging is that by the time you realize you're not in shape for it, it's too far to walk back." - Franklin P. Jones
  12. "I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands." - Unknown
  13. "I'm not clumsy. It's just the floor hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way." - Unknown
  14. "I'm not saying I'm Wonder Woman, I'm just saying no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman in the same room together..." - Unknown
  15. "I put my phone on airplane mode, but it's not flying. Worst. Transformer. Ever." - Unknown
  16. "My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do." - Unknown
  17. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right." - Unknown
  18. "My life is like a romantic comedy, except there's no romance and I'm just really bad at math." - Unknown
  19. "I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug." - Unknown
  20. "I'm not addicted to coffee, we're just in a committed relationship." - Unknown
  21. "I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure." - Unknown
  22. "I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort." - Zach Galifianakis
  23. "I can resist everything except temptation." - Oscar Wilde
  24. "I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants." - A. Whitney Brown
  25. "I'm not sure if I was the class clown or if the class clown was the guy sitting next to me." - Unknown
  26. "I'm not saying I'm Batman, I'm just saying no one has ever seen me and Batman in the same room together..." - Unknown
  27. "I don't need an alarm clock. My ideas wake me." - Ray Bradbury
  28. "I don't need anger management. I just need people to stop pissing me off." - Unknown
  29. "If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito in the room." - Dalai Lama
  30. "I used to be a people person, but people ruined that for me." - Unknown
  31. "The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." - Abraham Lincoln

20 Funniest quotes of all time to make you laugh hard

  1. "I'm not sure what's more exhausting: being an adult, being a kid, or pretending to be a responsible adult when I'm still just a kid at heart." - Unknown
  2. "I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure." - Unknown
  3. "The harder I work, the luckier I get. Or so they say. I'm still waiting for the luck to kick in." - Unknown
  4. "I'm not clumsy, I'm just allergic to gravity." - Unknown
  5. "I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it." - Unknown
  6. "I have a fear of speed bumps, but I'm slowly getting over it." - Unknown
  7. "I may be a genius, but even geniuses have their limits. Like trying to put a fitted sheet on a mattress." - Unknown
  8. "I'm not lazy, I'm just in energy-saving mode." - Unknown
  9. "Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers." - Unknown
  10. "I'm not old, I'm just retro." - Unknown
  11. "I'm not addicted to chocolate, chocolate is addicted to me." - Unknown
  12. "I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised." - Unknown
  13. "I'm not saying I'm Wonder Woman, I'm just saying no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman in the same room together..." - Unknown
  14. "I'm not saying I'm a superhero, I'm just saying I haven't seen any villains around lately." - Unknown
  15. "Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it the most never use it." - Unknown
  16. "I don't have a short attention span, I just...oh look, a squirrel!" - Unknown
  17. "I told my kids I wanted to be a millionaire. They said, 'That's great, Dad! How many dollars is a millionaire?'" - Unknown
  18. "I'm not saying I'm Wonder Woman, I'm just saying no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman in the same room together..." - Unknown
  19. "I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life." - Unknown
  20. "I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure." - Unknown


Laughter is the best medicine, and funny quotes can be a delightful way to bring humor and joy into our lives. From famous comedians to renowned authors, these funny quotes showcase the wit, cleverness, and humor of notable individuals throughout history.

Whether you're sharing them with friends, using them as a pick-me-up during a tough day, or simply enjoying a good laugh, funny quotes have the power to brighten our day and lift our spirits.

So, the next time you're in need of a dose of laughter, turn to these famous funny quotes for a quick mood boost. Remember, laughter is contagious and has numerous health benefits, including reducing stress, increasing happiness, and strengthening social connections.

Share these quotes with others, bookmark them for a rainy day, or use them as a reminder not to take life too seriously. Embrace the power of laughter and let these famous funny quotes put a smile on your face! Here's to more laughter and happiness in your life!

Guest Contributor

We often come across some fantastic writers who prefer to publish their writings on our blogs but prefer to stay anonymous. We dedicate this section to all superheroes who go the extra mile for us.